Oblong Scone

Before the internet came along, it was generally accepted that the only people who would use computers in their leisure time would be "enthusiasts". But with the dawn of computers doing interesting things like sending smileys, showing pictures of naked people (I remember having to look at wire-frame naked people back in the eighties, you had to use your imagination, it wasn't all done for you) and breaking news stories about cats, technology is no longer just the preserve of the ginger bearded. People who watch operas even have a twiddle. But these non-techy people wriggling their manicured   toes in the pond of technology still seem to intuitively understand one important technological principle: computers are binary. Trip Advisor demonstrates this well. As of 20/11/2014, not one single review, all of which use a scale of 1-5 stars to indicate your assessment of a service, has been assigned a score other than five or one stars. Every hotel and restaurant in th

Sometimes you need a flapjack. There is no metaphor here, because if there is one thing that cannot be used figuratively it is a flapjack. I'm not reporting something here, I am telling you that this is the way it must be. If you need to make an overarching point via the medium of analogy use football matches or a paperclip factory, or Belgium, leave the crazy fudged up oats alone. Sometimes you need a flapjack. It was such a day today. The centre of Bristol has jettisoned its Chandos sandwich shop, has thrown the woman with the Salted Monks by the Watershed into mythological memories. You are a man surrounded only by pretzels. Only by pretzels. People really want to sell you pretzels. They carry plates of pretzels around offering you free sample after free sample after free sample. The world has produced too many pretzels and the pretzel foot soldiers are hungry for battle. In a few years they will be tired and disillusioned as happens in every war, but for now they only want y