Wednesday, January 18, 2006

Politics and Video Recorders
"I wouldn’t have a clue how to program the video recorder, I let my kids do that" said some politician on the radio this morning. I wish I’d caught his name, but I didn’t. To him he probably thought he was saying that he was just like you, technology foxed him, so you could relate to and trust him. To me it sounded like he had the IQ of a sprout.
Personally I do not think that someone who admits to not being able to program a Video Recorder should be allowed in any kind of position of responsibility. Surely an MP should have a level of IQ that would allow him to undertake such a task?
Are the only tasks this man is able to undertake at a lower complexity than typing a number into a remote control. Is this man able to do up his shoe laces? Can he use door-handles or spell the word "cat"? Does he live his whole life locked in a special room, waited on hand and foot so that all he has to personally undertake is eating and crapping?
I want a politician that can program video recorders representing me. I think it should be a minimum requirement for anyone wanting to take political office. A simple practical exam should be given to any person wanting to stand for election: A Hitachi Nicam Video recorder and the task of recording tomorrow’s episode of Neighbours. After the target episode has aired, an independent public funded panel should sit and view the contents of the video tape and ensure that the entire episode is present. If any of Neighbours is missing(Aussie Slicer), then that will be an automatic fail. Similarly, if more than five minutes of either the preceding program "Newsround" or the succeeding program The Six’O’Clock News has been recorded(splodger), that will also constitute a fail.
Let’s get this simple exam installed so we can have a better Britain.

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